Moving from Patiala to Chandigarh

Time has come for me to move from Patiala to Chandigarh. Still associated with Lakshya but moving to Chandigarh. Three long years have gone by. Thinking about the last working day spent at Lakshya, Patiala. Scribbled a few lines:

इस मुकाम पर आ पहुंचे हैं हम,
जब लगता था कि कोई होगा नहीं साथ,
क्या उम्मीद थी कि कोई गर्मजोशी से मिलाएगा हाथ.

आज जब घर से चल पड़े हम,
आँखें थी नम, दिल बड़ा कमज़ोर था,
सोच रहा था जहा बसाई दुनिया मैंने,
क्यों वहीं से आगे बढ़ चला था.

जब मेरे जाने का वक़्त आया,
कुछ ने बड़े ही सर्द होकर हमसे रुखसत ली,
और कुछ ने हमें गले से लगाया और कहा,
शुरुआत इतनी हसीं नहीं थी पर अब क्यों जाते हो,
जब दिल से दिल दोस्त बने, क्यों अकेला कर जाते हो,
मैं मुस्कुराया, कोशिश थी आँखें नम न हो,
किसी को मेरी कमज़ोरियों का इल्म न हो.

एक और साथी से तो मिल भी ना सका,
बेखबर ही मैं बिना उसकी दुआओं के बगैर आगे बढ़ चला,
दुआ करूंगा कि मेरे साथ मेरे दोस्तों का साथ हमेशा रहे,
अकेले ही रह जाउँ दीवारों और सिक्कों के साथ, ऐसी फ़तेह मुझे कभी ना मिले.

FEAR

One of the most important human feeling that challenges beliefs, self-confidence and capability is fear. What is fear ? For me, fear originates in doubt. The moment I doubt something, I fear. Fear is not getting afraid and crouching. Fear can also manifest in aggression and ability to accept.

I used to watch a US sitcom very popular in the world - FRIENDS. There's an episode on how the actors react when they turned 30. Hmm, the revelation dawned upon me only lately. Turning 30 is a huge milestone. If I were to approximate human life to approximately 60 years (arguable), I have spent half my life. I am going through my checklist of "things to do" and I realize, there's a lot to catch up to.

So how does FEAR come into picture ?

Even after turning 30, I still have to cope up with FEAR. I fear if I will be able to fulfill my dreams. When I do that, I let my dreams fade away little by little. When I think about saying what I feel frankly, I fear how the other person might react. I fear about giving up something dear to my heart to attain something else. I fear failure, I fear imperfection. I fear to start all over again. I fear to mend the relationships, I fear status, I fear judgements. FEAR is so overpowering.

The moment FEAR becomes too big to handle, I close my eyes, think about the people I love most and God. It gives me immense strength. It gives me courage to fight that doubt. The moment I am certain, my mind becomes clear and I get going once again.

So why does FEAR creep in ?

Because sometimes we forget our philosophy with which we started, the reason why we started upon a journey and the objective that we intended to achieve. I believe, most people and civilizations that started off greatly perished on the way because they forgot the very idea that got them going - the very engine that revved up their progress. This idea, the engine needs a lot of care. If you don't care for the engine but just want to pedal down to success at a lot of MPH, you gonna ruin the engine en-route the journey before the destination is reached. Most of us make this mistake.

Care for the idea, the dream you started out with. Believe in it and it will eventually come your way. Sometimes, it's a good idea to revisit the starting point. Probably that's why, history is an important subject.

As for me, I am going to go after the checklist I made.

Harpreet